Blog:MrP/Feline Fecal Fun
From www.ChopStork.com
Laura, Luke, Jason, and I moved into a new place a couple weeks ago. It's nice. Full living, full dining, sweet kitchen, laundry, a backyard, a basketball court in the back yard, and even a basement. The basement is half finished, making a perfect romp room for the boys. Laura has made it clear that all xboxes, non-matching couches, and lewd materials are to remain in the rompus room. Since it's the darkest room (and the xboxes are there), the HDTV belongs their too. Meaning Luke spends much of his time down stairs.
For the two weeks we've lived here, Luke has insisted the basement stinks of something. I agreed it was a musty basement, but I haven't been watching any TV lately, so I didn't care too much. There was plenty of unpacking to be done upstairs. Tonight we all went down to watch some TV. Laura was the first to comment on the stink, but she always finds something that stinks. Then Old Man said it stunk too. They searched for stink sources with no success. Mildew, pipe leaks, and dead rats were not to be found. I still couldn't smell it, and they gave up. Then it hit me. Vile. Rotten. Odious. Execrable. I retraced their search in more detail. Checked remaining boxes in the office - no dead animals. But in the depths of the built in bookshelves, one the very bottom row, I spotted shadows. A family of shadows, unmoving yet suspect. Without disturbing the offender, I snuck away to get a flashlight. Upon returning I was horrified to learn the beasts' true identity:
There's cat poo in our basement!!!!!! And it's been there for two weeks, plus at least a month that the previous occupants were gone before that. How did we not find this earlier??!! How did Luke not find this earlier?!?!?! Sorry, Luke, you were right - something stinks down there. It's still there right now, cuz none of us want to clean it. Should we call the landlord, "Uh, yeah ... one of the floor boards is loose, something might be wrong with the hot water heater, oh and there's cat poo. Can you send someone to pick it up?" You know how leases say you must leave the house as clean as it was when you moved in? Well, we get to leave shit in the house now. Score.
